Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning laywer?
A: Take your foot off his head.

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.

Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
A. From chasing parked ambulances.

Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Heck, you would need over 100 just to lobby for the research grant.