All I ask is a chance to prove money can't make me happy.

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.

In an argument, a woman always has the last word. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

When blondes have more fun, do they know it?

Money isn't everything but it sure keeps the kids in touch.

If you think there is good in everybody then you obviously haven't met everybody.

All power corrupts. Absolute power is pretty neat, though.

You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.